Monday, September 19, 2011

Waivers Needed for Playdates

It appears my idea of fun and that of 8-year-old boys are not the same.  Recently, my little guy invited a gaggle of boys over to play after school and it was completely nuts!  Things were peachy keen at first;  they came in starving--demanding a snack---I fed them milk and cookies--Classic!  They were such precious little imps...gobbling down the cookies and wearing milk moustaches proudly--I was beaming with motherly warmth.  I had become Donna Reed.....

Within  minutes my fairytale image was shot to hell when one of the boys took off his shirt, ran outside, and grabbed a big stick and started yelling......the rest followed.  It was like a Lord of The Flies re-enactment........screaming, chanting, big sticks flailing about....."Oh My God!," I screamed, "That's how somebody loses an eye!"  I know I was being a total wet blanket...but what else could I do? It calmed them for a moment.....

I returned to the kitchen, enjoying the solitude, imagining the boys playing hide and seek and the like........obviously I'm a boy-mommy-moron......

The next sound I heard was engines...Greased Lightening at Thunder Road......the boys had taken the moped and gocart out front---without helmets, shoes or shirts...and without asking....Note to self:  Hide the key!  These little maniacs were insane in the membrane and I had no more brainpower!  By the time I yelled, screamed, cried enough to get them off said motorized equipment....parents came to pick up.  Thank GOD!  Until I heard one of the little suckers rat me out with, "Dad!  This is the most dangerous house I've ever been to!  Can I come back tomorrow?"  ACES!  I hear I'm nominated for Mom of The Year!  WINNER!

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