I've had it up to here with the constant huffing and puffing, eye-rolling, bad attitudes, and overall pain-in-the-assness from my kids lately. I am praying this is a short phase and they are just trying to establish some independence and push the envelope a little. It had better be. I have become white noise to my kids. And I've tried every effort to correct this behavior: positive reinforcement, taking away privileges, grounding them......everything has failed miserably. The other day we were in the store and my kids were absolute monsters with no listening skills whatsoever. I completely lost my shit and I hate when that happens because you're the one that looks like the spectacle. I mean seriously, you harbor these little people for 9 months, feed them, bathe them, care for them.....give them endless Webkinz and Wii games.....for what in return? A bunch of lip service and never-ending "But why nots?!?!?!"
I have given this much critical thought and I've decided to fight fire with fire. Who do they think they are, anyway? This is NOT a democracy. My husband and I own their butts until they are 18. If they think they can out-sass me they are crazy. I am as tenacious as Atilla the Hun when it comes to debate. I will have the last word (or at least frustrate and confuse them into a state of silence)
I have pulled a few gems from my memory bank that I think serve verbal arguments well. The following are a few of my favorites:
1) La la la la la ala....I'm not listening.
2) You're rubber and I'm glue whatever you say bounces off me and sticks to you.
3) I know you are but what am I?
And when all else fails and you're about to turn into Joan Crawford.....use the following as your trump card...
4) Infinity!
That word alone says it all: "I have claimed the highest high and you have nowhere to go, kid!"
Take that...haters! Happy Parenting!!!!!
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